Every hook-up app has its pros and cons, and we should always advocate for safe use.

On one hand, there are the thrills of the unknown and mystery that come when meeting somebody for the first time – figuring out what that person might look like, what their hobbies are, what’s their style… 

On the other hand, there might be some risks associated with chatting to a stranger. For these reasons, here’s an updated list of the 11 basic steps we recommend following to ensure you stay safe when dating and using hook-up apps.

1. Ask for a face pic or, even better, video chat with them
Asking for a picture is a smooth way to make sure that the user you’re chatting with is who they say they are. However, there’s always the possibility that the picture might be someone else’s. 

For this reason, it might be safer to video chat with them. Once you’ve been chatting to them for a while, take it a step forward and ask them to bring the conversation on camera. This can be a good option for staying safe on hook–up apps. 

2. Be mindful when sharing intimate photos
Sexting and spicy photos can add a degree of excitement to the conversations. Some might think this is compatible with the safe use of hook-up apps, some might not.

However, without feeling forced or compromised, users have complete freedom to share any kind of picture with the consent of both parties and in compliance with the safety regulations of the dating platform. 

However, it is important to keep in mind that it could be dangerous to share our intimacy and vulnerability with a stranger at such an early stage. 

3. Don’t share too much personal information
Learn how to maintain the balance between the information that is necessary for them to get to know you and the more private stuff that could put you at risk. 

For instance, avoid certain topics such as your address, how much money you earn, where you work… As a hypothetical case, they might want to send you flowers to your flat. Let them know they can give them to you at the meeting point. 

Talk about your hobbies, your interests, and even your family, but avoid too many personal details.

4. Check out their socials and verify their identity
Once it is considered to be a reasonable moment, ask them for their socials such as Instagram or Facebook and verify their identity. 

Are they the same person that you had video chatted with last time? What kind of things do they post? Who do they follow? Be wary of accounts with low followers or unusual usernames. 

You could even have friends in common, who you can ask for more information about your potential date. 

5. Let your friends know and share your location
Another key aspect of safely using hook-up apps is to tell somebody you trust if you’re going on a date. Moreover, ask them what they think about the person. A second opinion can be really helpful to take into consideration. 

On the day of the date, turn on your GPS and share your location with your friend. Let them know when and where you are meeting. Besides being a precautionary move, this will provide you a sense of security which will lead you to enjoy the date even more and focus on the present. 

6. Meet in public first
Choose a place where you feel comfortable, like a bar or somewhere you know how to get home from if needed.

7. Be wary of food and drinks
It is better to decline any food or drinks that they might offer you, especially if they don’t taste it beforehand or are not sharing it with you. 

They might just be trying to be nice, but you can reach that conclusion in other ways. 

8. Be wary of your personal belongings
Don’t leave your bags or personal items unattended. If you bring money with you, keep it hidden and keep your valuable properties unseen. It’s not about being extremely cautious and overly suspicious, but prudent. 

For example, if you go to the toilet, bring your valuables with you instead of asking them to keep an eye on them. 

9. Be aware of false promises and trust your instincts
Pay attention to suspicious behaviour. Even if you think you might be biased because you want things to work out, don’t forget that your body is wise, and it will let you know if something is wrong. 

Observe how they treat others and pay attention to the language they use and how they treat you. 

10. Don’t be afraid to decline any offer you might not be comfortable with
Just because it is a date with a potential partner and you might like them, it doesn’t mean that you have to say yes to anything they might ask for. If you do not feel comfortable with a proposal, make sure to make it clear and don’t be afraid of making the wrong impression.

Remember, dates are meant to be a fun experience, so if you are not down for certain things there’s no harm in saying it.  

11. Report any threatening or suspicious behaviour and seek help if needed
If you get the feeling something is wrong, leave immediately and alert friends, even call them if needed. The definite rule for staying safe when using hook-up apps is ensuring that you always have an emergency contact to reach out to, such as the following:

• Call An Garda Síochána on 999 or 112
• LGBT Helpline 
• TENI Helpline (Transgender Support) 
• Dublin Rape Crisis Centre 
• Federation for Victim Assistance 
• Dublin Lesbian Line