Cuan, Ireland’s national agency tackling domestic, sexual, and gender-based violence (DSGBV), has launched The Hardest Stories, a campaign to raise awareness about the issue. Among the stories shared as part of the campaign is one that specifically targets the LGBTQ+ community, using an intersectional lens to combat stereotypes about intimate partner violence. 

By breaking the silence, The Hardest Stories campaign begins the urgent work of creating a society where everyone—regardless of gender, sexuality, or identity—can live free from the shadow of violence. The campaign features four fictionalised stories, each reflecting the real experiences of survivors in Ireland today. The fictionalised characters include Emer, Orla Paul and David, who tell their own stories either through video or audio.

One of these follows David, a gay man navigating the trauma of sexual violence. His story unfolds in chapters, beginning with “His face seemed sweet” in Chapter One, moving through “I didn’t want to do anything” in Chapter Four, and reaching “I just couldn’t stop him” in Chapter Five. Though fictional, David’s experience is reflective of thousands of LGBTQ+ people affected by DSGBV.  

David’s story is available via Soundcloud to listen to and will be broadcasted via public radio in the coming days. You can listen to David’s story here.

DSGBV against men remains vastly underreported, often due to stigma, shame, and societal misconceptions. The Central Statistics Office (CSO) Sexual Violence Study found that 28% of men surveyed had experienced sexual violence in their lifetime, yet half had never told anyone. For LGBTQ+ survivors, these barriers can be even greater, compounded by fears of discrimination, erasure, or being disbelieved.  

The launch of Cuan’s The Hardest Stories campaign on intimate partner violence comes on the same day (February 26) as Ruth Coppinger moves a private members’ motion calling for a 10-point action plan on DSGBV. The motion emphasises vital legal reforms, including ending the use of counselling notes in rape trials and banning character references in cases of gender-based violence.  

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All Rape Crisis Centres in Ireland provide help to everyone, regardless of sex, gender, or sexual orientation. If David’s story resonates with you or someone you know, there is support is available. By sharing these stories, Cuan’s campaign shines a light on the realities of LGBTQ+ survivors, challenging silence and stigma to create a future where no one has to suffer alone.

Several Irish community organisations working across LGBTQ+ issues and domestic, sex, gender and sexuality-based violence have recently come together to establish the LGBTQI+ Community IPA (Intimate Partner Abuse) Network. The goal of the network is to develop cross-training and pathways between the domestic violence and LGBTQ+ sectors to enable a more nuanced, informed, and inclusive response to intimate partner abuse.

If you have been affected by this story or are in need of support, there are numerous services available:

• Women’s Aid helpline for 24/7 support at 1800 341 900, available to assist anyone experiencing abuse, regardless of gender.
• Men’s Aid helpline – 01 554 3811
• The National Male Advice Line run by Men’s Development Network, 1800 816 588
• LGBT Helpline, 1800 929 539.
• Aoibhneas is a women and children’s refuge, 01 867 0701 or email [email protected]
• Immigrant Council of Ireland supports migrant women experiencing domestic violence, 01 674-0200
• HSE information line, 1800 700 700
• Safe Ireland provides a list of services across all Ireland
• Dublin Rape Crisis Centre, 1800 778 888
• Anyone in immediate danger should call emergency services at 999.